superuseless superpowersSUPERUSELESS SUPERPOWER: Quaker Oates John Oates (of Hall & Oates fame) was blessed with a thick, black moustache and fingers that can tickle a soul guitar into making heavenly sounds. His cousin, Quaker Oates, was not-so-blessed with a direct connection from his stomach to East Coast fault lines. In other words, when Quaker’s tum-tum goes grrrrrrr….Delaware could fall into the Atlantic Ocean. Oka
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